Archive for March, 2011

argh cramps..
argh cramps.. avatar

by on Mar.09, 2011, under ramblings

this morning i was woken by a leg cramp, this happens every now and then, thankfully today’s was not as severe as others i have experienced in the past. many nights i woke ash screaming in pain due to severe leg cramps. after the first few times she got used to the routine – and i suppose realising all was ok even though i was screaming like i was just stabbed – rubbing my leg to help the cramp subside a little quicker.

today i tried my best to rub my leg down with my other foot, somewhat helping but just not as effective. takkun ran in to check on me, although i didn’t yell out as loudly as i normally would either.

as the years have gone by, clearly the knowledge on the internet has advanced, rather than people trading porn and making retarted blogs like my own, there is some useful information now. years ago when i first looked up how to avoid cramps, the repetitive answer i found was ‘add more salt to your diet’ this time around however, the information is far more.. informative.

apparently cramps are caused by dehydration, over exertion, electrolyte imbalance and muscle fatigue.

so this makes a lot of sense. i am not carrying water on my bike lately, yesterday i only had one bottle of water instead of my usual 3-4 and i have been trying to push myself harder on my bike, achieving 20mins and below on my 10km ride even into 30knot (55km/hr!!!) winds.

one thing though that grabbed my attention, according to one site cramps that occur repetitively and in the same area can be caused by nerve damage. when i was 15 i was hit by a car and my nerves were damaged in my left leg, leaving me with a numb feeling which has gotten slightly better over the years. guess which leg always cramps? thats right, my left one.

so i am supposing a combination of the nerve damage, dehydrantion and muscle fatigue is what is causing my left calf to cramp up into a ball of painful muscle.

only thing i can change i suppose is more water.

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as the world turns..
as the world turns.. avatar

by on Mar.07, 2011, under music i like, ramblings


i have been wanting to find music similar to telefon tel aviv for a little while now, admittedly i didn’t ever look really hard but i decided to tonight, and i think i’ve found a few. it may help that telefon remixed the artists, and they’re not quite telefon tel aviv, but if everyone made music exactly the same then there would be no point in any of that would there? the above artist is moderat (modselector and apparat), the other artists i’ve just enjoyed on youtube are nitrada and apparat.

also, i read something strangely beautiful today, although it was about a somewhat taboo subject, but this is how it went

The so-called ‘psychotically depressed’ person who tries to kill herself doesn’t do so out of quote ‘hopelessness’ or any abstract conviction that life’s assets and debits do not square. And surely not because death seems suddenly appealing. The person in whom Its invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level will kill herself the same way a trapped person will eventually jump from the window of a burning high-rise. Make no mistake about people who leap from burning windows. Their terror of falling from a great height is still just as great as it would be for you or me standing speculatively at the same window just checking out the view; i.e. the fear of falling remains a constant. The variable here is the other terror, the fire’s flames: when the flames get close enough, falling to death becomes the slightly less terrible of two terrors. It’s not desiring the fall; it’s terror of the flame yet nobody down on the sidewalk, looking up and yelling ‘Don‘t!’ and ‘Hang on!’, can understand the jump. Not really. You’d have to have personally been trapped and felt flames to really understand a terror way beyond falling.

it was written by author david foster wallace in his book infinite jest– unfortunately he committed suicide himself a few years later in 2008. after reading more about this immensely talented man, the more i want to read his books, so i’ll have to be on the look out.

meanwhile, in the strangeness that is my head, i am thinking, as always. a few minutes ago, i remembered how mum told me that i was ‘of that age’ where you need to try figure yourself out, transition from one group of friends to another, figure out what makes me happy and so on and so forth. i just wish i was in my old room, in melbourne. the house that kip and i moved in toghether, then i was there by myself, and then leash moved in to help with rent. either way it was my room.. and its the place i have felt like i was home the most, which is strange, because i was miles away from my family and i only have 2 or 3 of the same friends from back then. i sometimes wish i was in the same state of mind. not the end, not before i left. when i spoke to hot girls on the phone lying in my bed with the polar bear sheets my mum sent me one year, a short walk from an awesome pizza shop and a funky laundrette, where the leaves fell from the trees in the winter and the sun stayed up until 9pm in the summer. when i had an emotion other than ‘meh’. when i was happy.

i’d like to get out of it. this meh.


before i go, the above quote is entirely unrelated. i’m far to meh to even bother with anything so stupid, so dont get yourself all worried.

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cats that look like takkun #2
cats that look like takkun #2 avatar

by on Mar.06, 2011, under takkun impersonators

oh i see what you did there..

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gravy ravey..
gravy ravey.. avatar

by on Mar.03, 2011, under music i like, ramblings

so i was told the music i requested at a club was too rave-ish.. so.. get me loaded up and take me to a rave. now.

pic sort of related. i’d so make out with her if she took off her mask. damn hot cyber goth girls 😛

music somewhat related. its ravey.

c-lekktor – our dark side (sin.thetic squad remix)

mmm.. chips and gravy.

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me in 30 years..
me in 30 years.. avatar

by on Mar.01, 2011, under ramblings







(takes a little to load, patient bitches!) or for those without silly ipads, the sauce is


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while i’m here..
while i’m here.. avatar

by on Mar.01, 2011, under music i like, ramblings

also, how hard could it possibly be to find a girl that is, essentially, a deftones song. any deftones song really. well probably the softer ones. someone that isn’t mental preferably. lately the deftones just make me think of everything awesome in my life that i’ve had or want at one point or another.

deftones – 976-evil

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i eat hamburgers and i want all the girls, a whoo hoo hoo..
i eat hamburgers and i want all the girls, a whoo hoo hoo.. avatar

by on Mar.01, 2011, under music i like, ramblings

so this morning i pumped my tyres up to 110psi, put on my fancy shoes and jumped on my bike. the difference is.. unreal. i could pedal so much faster and with so much less effort than before. less effort is probably not a good thing, but the upshot of less effort is that i have a bit of go left in me to go even faster still. i took 10mins of my 10km ride today which really is quite unbelievable. all because of some wankery shoes.

so yes, i admit my stubborness all this time has been wrong, like my refusal to wear lycra for a long time only to discover that the padding in the pants make things so much more comfortable and far less painful. i dont wear the lycra top though, thas just.. ew. now the shoes. why couldn’t someone just tell me that i’d be able to ride faster for longer?

i suppose all the people at work just assume i’m lazy and fat and useless and therefore are incapable of riding at speed. a few guys have been inviting me on their wednesday morning ride. i haven’t gone yet because it starts at 6am and the only way for me to get here by then is to drive, there just arent any trains that leave that early. even though this i feel is an entirely legitimate reason to not attend a ride along the river, one of the guys said to me ‘oh, its ok, we normally do a fairly consistent 30km/hr but if you can’t keep up we won’t leave you behind’

i mean wtf! ‘hey fatty fat fat, can’t you keep up?’ i could most likely maintain 30km/hr for much longer than any of these guys could. when i was their age, i rode 30km/hr for 8hrs straight up hill into the wind in 6 feet of snow while it was raining across a mine field. fuckers.

day two of no boss is going.. not so well. its nothing to do with him, he isn’t the glue that was holding us together, in fact for the most part he was really quite useless. its just the week that most projects are kicking off and there is far too much to do in far too little time. i’ve yet again not actually been able to work on anything. my first chance is now, 5:15pm.. which is just simply ridiculous. yes, yes, i’m aware i’m now wasting time posting here, but i just need to chill for a few minutes, regain some composure and try knock out a few rfi responses before i head home. not my idea of a wonderful evening but i’ve not got much choice right now.

and while i have chilling out on my mind, i’d love to find some new music that i can relax to. musically over the years, from when i was shown the light of (then awesome) triple j, enjoying alternative rock tunes, i progressed to industrial and heavier alternative rock. as time passed my tastes became heavier with a sprinkling of lighter stuff like pumpkins and placebo in between. then suddenly my taste diverted to pay attention to ebm and dance like vnv nation, razed in black, aethetic perfection and sin.thetic squad – somewhere in the middle of that, i discovered telefon tel aviv through a nine inch nails remix and whenever i need to chill out, which lately is a bit, i grab one of their albums and smoosh my stubby little fingers on the play button.

i still listen to my fair share of heavy music and telefon tel aviv is not all i listen to when i want to chill, but its certainly my preference. others i listen to is team sleep and air, or in a stretch some of the lighter deftones songs. if there is anything out there though, i’d be super keen to know.

telefon tel aviv – bubble and spike

and of course, in my usual fashion, i’ve found another girl to have a crush over, tatooed, stretched ears and absolutely stunning. incidentally she makes hamburgers, and i.. well i like to eat hamburgers. so prepare to watch me blow up like a baloon from feeding my face on cheesy meaty burgery goodness. oh my.

pic is related, its the store. music also related, but somewhat in reverse.

the whitlams – i make hamburgers

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