Author Archive

Watch “Campbell Newman’s dumbest idea.” on YouTube
Watch “Campbell Newman’s dumbest idea.” on YouTube avatar

by on Jan.16, 2015, under ramblings

Regardless of what side you support, you really have to sit back and think about some of this stuff.

Campbell Newman’s dumbest idea.: http://youtu.be/NAOeQ-uI6HI

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20 seconds until..
20 seconds until.. avatar

by on Dec.24, 2014, under ramblings


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Aliens.. avatar

by on Dec.07, 2014, under ramblings

I don’t think I can take Ancient Aliens seriously anymore. I’m watching the ‘Genius Factor’ episode, they just compared Steve Jobs to Da Vinci, Tesla and Einstein.

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You Never Miss The Red Flags
You Never Miss The Red Flags avatar

by on Dec.04, 2014, under ramblings


It’s hard to look at the long term when there is instant gratification to be had

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Over Combed
Over Combed avatar

by on Dec.03, 2014, under ramblings


One Direction will probably be the cause of the collapse of humanity as we know it. With their devout followers that mostly consist of tweens with comb overs, these kids have never experienced deep feelings of denial that a man with a few smile lines has when he gives his hair that carefully precise comb to the side to hide the shiny patch of skin aching to expose itself to the world.

I mean, I even work with a guy with a carefully crafted full head hair helmet. He might as well wear some fruit on his head and pretend he’s a cat. I suppose at least when it comes time for a real comb over these kids will be prepared, that is if they’re able to master the comb over sans hair.

For what its worth, the only person that ever looked good with a comb over was John-Baptiste Emanuel Zorg.


Now there’s some style.

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Enjoy The Silence
Enjoy The Silence avatar

by on Nov.29, 2014, under music i like

A nice little Depeche Mode cover

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Maybe he’s a magician?
Maybe he’s a magician? avatar

by on Nov.22, 2014, under ramblings


I just saw a Carl Barron box set of DVDs at the shops. I want to know how you can make one joke span four DVDs?

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I have decided that my future is to breed fat children in Dubai
I have decided that my future is to breed fat children in Dubai avatar

by on Nov.19, 2014, under ramblings

So according to this news article there is a competition in Dubai that for every kilogram your child loses, you get a gram of gold.


My Grandad always said I was going to come up with a great idea and become a rich man one day and I think that this here is my idea of ideas!

I think my plan of attack will be to accept donations of multiple children, I don’t think I could subject my own offspring to the fattening as I feel bad enough that Takkun is a bit of a porker at times. Once I receive a donation of a small child, I’ll feed them on a rich diet of duck fat and pork belly and the ultimate single hit of calories – the KFC double.


While I’m porking up my golden goose I’ll get them addicted to video games.. Once the competition begins I’ll rig up a big running wheel or treadmill which will power the television, I’ll put little lard arse on  said treadmill and with a carefully calculated concoction of methamphetamine and laxatives I’ll have the kilos off in no time.

If I can get a kid up to 100kg and back down to 50kg again that’s 50g of gold which equates to a cool $2200 at that rate, I’ll only need 454.5 children to become a millionaire, not taking into account the cost of KFC and meth.

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